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"District 9" - Even the prawns have a heart


parentheses after the bizarre about New Moon, it's time to move away from the often repetitive world of fantasy and advance in what are often more varied and interesting (in my opinion) of science fiction. After a long wait, finally we Italians have been able to see the first work by Neill Blomkamp (with Peter "Lord of the Rings" / "King Kong "/" Braindead "Jackson as executive producer):" District 9 "speaks of apartheid, and it uses aliens and laser beams. Yeah, exactly. The plot, which sees precisely the aliens as refugees in a slum in South Africa, where the government segregates them and exploit them, local people fear them and the gangs are trying constantly to deceive, it is very original, and the first part of the movie truly sad and heartbreaking: in it we see the human protagonist, an agent military government company who knowingly and with taste performs its task, which is to deceive and squeeze the aliens with contempt-called "jumbo shrimp"-and even laughs and smiles when burning a hut full of alien eggs, in which the children already scream of pain. Not too many "spoilers", it said only that an event happens that will bring the protagonist to move slowly on the side of the aliens, and then slowly the last half hour the film becomes a more conventional action fracassone with (almost ) revenge of the good. Nevertheless, the film is recommended for the charm of the plot for the original style "reportage" that is especially suited to the first part and the novel way in which the aliens are shown - not as saviors or destroyers, but only victims of 'man.

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"New Moon" in a nutshell - get ready for a hysterical


After the resounding success of the previous post about my sister I decided to take matters in hand and celebrate with my masculine prose the imminent release of the film "New Moon" through a summary of the plot of the book:

The day of the eighteenth birthday of Bella Swan, the Cullen family held a grand party with women, alcohol and heroin in rivers. Before he lost the directions for the overdose, Edward decided to give her gift to the girl. "How kind, a knife to cut the meat favoring my soul deep and desperate!" Bella roared with a strange cry in falsetto, while the coca puffs coming out of both nostrils. The girl immediately began to affect his arms in the fashion Emo, but this seemed somehow excite the young Jasper, who already was angry with her for having a name like that. Given the massive erection of Jasper, Edward sensed the danger and decided to move his entire family in Hawaii. "But I was happy here!" protested Uncle Alfredo "Shut up, you in this book does not even exist," replied Edward, "Shit, it's true!" concluded Uncle Alfred, disappearing with a loud bang. Following the departure of Edward, Bella fell into depression, and suicidal tendencies were accentuated and Emo exponentially, helping to make an outcast of society who was on the cock at all (yes, as if it were earlier). After a while, the girl struck a close friendship with Jacob, who turned out to be a werewolf when little slyly, he decided to take her to bed one night of full moon. "You know," Jacob said, picking his teeth with the clavicle of a peasant "the wolves are the worst enemies of the vampires" "Since when?" Bella asked, confused. "But from the movie Underworld, of course!" said Jacob. And to prove it, saved the spot by two vampire characters children have come to avenge the death of a character who died earlier that everyone had already forgotten, as the intellectual level of the average fan of Twilight is anything but sublime, then much less memory. But I digress. However, Bella for some reason (perhaps because of the massive drug use or blood loss caused by his repeated attempts suicide) was discovered in his head he heard the voice of Edward when he was extreme activities like bungee jumping into volcanos, beaten to death as passers-by using a stick or attach alligator eyes Chuck Norris for more than three seconds. All this for some distorted reason, drives a seer stoned to think that Bella wants to commit suicide (which indeed was true, as she was Emo - but anyway). A phone call dubious and somewhat soft porn between Jacob and Edward does believe that his beautiful young vampire (ah, ah) is dead, thrown into a state of frustration and anxiety typically Emo. In Italy, Edward meets the super-mega-hyper-robot-zombie-vampire apocalypse, better known as "Volturi" or "Andreotti". "I want to die, ugly bastards!" cried to them, with streams of tears that gushed from his eyes and trails of slime that dripped on his chin. "Why?" asked the Volturi. "Because I hate the fact that my beautiful (ha ha) is dead." Then the Volturi buffeted him and reproached him: "You should be ashamed! If you hate something you should not say, do not give anyone anything, you're an ignoramus!" "And who the fuck is that you think so?" asked Edward. "The fans of this saga, judging by the comments to previous post!" Volturi answered, breaking the fourth wall (I know you have no idea what it is. Eh, eh). Bella suddenly appeared from nowhere with a loud bang from the smell of sulfur, shouting, "Stop! Do not kill him!" "We did not want to kill him, bitch, though for some reason you have to die or become a vampire, a zombie or a mummy! Buahahah!" chuckled the Volturi. "Geese!" said the two lovers, Italianate pronunciation to fit the environment. "I love you, dovey!" Edward rooting when they were gone. "You are my big boy!" she said, stroking the tresses adorned with pink ribbons. "Marry me!" he said. "Okay, I melts me," said Bella, disappearing in a cloud of sulfur.

END ...?

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fever for New Moon? Wake up, people!

For months now, that there is nothing to talk about New Moon, the second chapter of the "Twilight Saga" (which Chuck Norris to save us a name so bad). The film will be released in November, I think, but it is almost a year that the hardcore fans of Meyer are the countdown pending release of the film. The newspapers even publish the Special dedicated entirely to the secrets of the set, the abdominal Robert Pattinson, Jacob looking at what has become ...
And to make matters worse, today I read that 22 October will be the New Moon Day at the Rome Film Festival , with an adjacent projection by 20 minutes of film!
right. is the new phenomenon of adolescence.
I myself, as has always shunned in the library with a mixture of horror and contempt, I ended up reading all four books for experimental purposes, or rather out of curiosity. And, I admit, I noticed that the entire quartet is pretty exciting to push you to finish it all in one go.
Yet each time I concluded that a chapter, and I did a quick summary of what I read, I realized that was one of the biggest nonsense ever written. This is a story built on nothing and basted even less, but took a huge hit.
Hats off to Meyer and let your heart at rest, I said to myself then.
But then the first movie came out.
Are definitely not a fan of Twilight and Meyer, indeed, but in my eyes the film is crap absurd than the book . Starting with the choice of the cast horribly wrong: just as an example, Rosalie looks like a prostitute obese than the most beautiful of them all, Edward, even if the plaintiff is not a process, not the way to the ideal described by ' author, and to make matters worse everyone read as lobotomized monkeys.
That is the question: after such a disgrace to film, how could she be so excited by the arrival of a sequel? I invite you, twilightfans, to open at least his eyes did not already, the saga is a masterpiece in itself, but at least do not lose your head for something even worse!

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Ice Age 3

NB: It 's an old article of my sister. I DO NOT TAKE RESPONSIBILITY '

Let's face it, came out in 2002 since the Ice Age, 20th Century Fox did not continue well. The first film, in fact, was a masterpiece, and above all it was truly innovative. As is too much too often, however, the greed of money and the old saying "Never change a winning team" led Fox to produce a sequel bad ...
Ice Age 2 - The Meltdown new characters were unbearable (we are talking possum voiced by Lee Ryan?) or completely unnecessary (meaning that they had the two sea monsters?), now the old corny in their stereotyped characters, and the squirrel, still looking in the face of reality, has had its day.
So, yesterday when I went to see Ice Age 3 , I had a good feeling. For more end to see a 3D movie in the fourth row is not the best. After the first three minutes I'd like to shoot: the same things, people! The AIS, which makes his jokes and wants to pack the kingdom, the tiger is a tough and lonely, the mammoth anxious, and Elly, I can not stand on principle ... But then, by when you leave the "ice age", the movie becomes really a hoot. Responsible for 99% of Buck, the ferret new entry, which is one of the most successful characters of recent times! In general, in addition to the brilliant and crazy Buck, the film takes its own pace and goes it's a beauty. do not even know whether or not to ashamed to say, in a scene I laughed so much that I have had the tears in my eyes - I had never happened before! - And if you still think we chuckle to myself. In the end, then, Ice Age has returned to great . Perhaps because it is no longer the ice age, but the dinosaurs ... anyway, I Board absolutely!